Trading in your styling team, loved ones and lavish home for a sweltering hammock in the South African bush is a dramatic change for anyone. But for Gemma Collins, this wasn't merely a fresh start – it was her chance at vindication.
Since walking away from I'm A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here! after a mere three days back in 2014, Gemma has carried the weight of perceived failure. So when the opportunity arose to appear on I'm A Celebrity: South Africa, she cast her anxieties aside and threw herself wholeheartedly into restoring her standing. Beyond confronting her demons and forging new friendships, she also experienced a revelation about domestic life and recognised her need for hormone replacement therapy to manage perimenopause.
"It was like I'd committed a murder," Gemma reflects on her initial jungle stint. "I stepped off the plane and Good Morning Britain was there. I've never lived it down. I felt like the woman from Game Of Thrones who has to walk through the streets naked."
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Gemma, 45, joins a roster of 12 celebrities taking on fresh trials and obstacles in the South African bush. She'll be alongside Adam Thomas, Ashley Roberts, Scarlett Moffatt, David Haye, Beverley Callard, Seann Walsh, Sinitta, Sir Mo Farah, Craig Charles, Jimmy Bullard and Harry Redknapp at Kruger National Park, a habitat teeming with black mambas, spitting cobras, spiders, scorpions, baboons, hippos, hyenas and leopards.
Prior to filming commencing in September, Gemma jetted off to Cyprus with her partner Rami Hawash to mark his milestone 50th birthday. During the getaway, she savoured her final taste of comfort and instructed him not to mention the looming challenge. Upon returning to the UK, she organised for specialist animal handlers to visit her residence with snakes and insects to help her prepare. Despite these efforts, she still felt underprepared.
"I did have a moment at Heathrow Airport, where I looked at my make-up artist and said, 'I don't know if I can do this.' And she literally slapped me. She was like, 'Get on that plane.'"
Gemma's anxieties persisted. "I did cry for about an hour into the plane journey because I was scared," says Gemma. "It brought back a lot of deep-rooted trauma from the past."
Determined to succeed, Gemma drew inspiration from pop icon Britney Spears. "When I hear the Britney song Stronger , that's my anthem," says Gemma. "I'm so proud of myself [for going] back there. I just felt so much stronger this time around."
As a beloved figure in reality television, Gemma maintains an incredibly hectic schedule. She's constantly active on social media, engaging with supporters. Beyond filming commitments, she's building a life with Rami and his eight year old son Tristan. Add to that walking the dogs and tending to the family's chickens.
Despite the absence of creature comforts, Gemma reveals the programme provided her with an essential break and escape from technology. "I felt I was a child, a young girl again without the pressures of fame or paying the bills," she explains. "In the jungle atmosphere you realise the good strengths and qualities in you because you've got no distractions. I thought, 'What does make me happy?' It's nature, my family, my partner and my stepson, my dogs."
The star is set to document her path to marriage and becoming a mum in her upcoming Sky series Four Weddings And A Baby, which she insists will offer her most honest portrayal to date. "You see me broken," Gemma admits. "It's not all plain sailing. It's very raw. You see that despite the lights, the big house, the glamorous life, you can still be broken in so many ways."
Her time apart from stepson Tristan while in the jungle helped her appreciate that the family she's longed for has been there all along. "Not many people know I've had a stepson in my life since he was three. I've never really shown our family life but on a Friday we normally pick my stepson up from school and our weekend starts. In the jungle I could feel from the back of my head those thoughts and memories coming forward on Friday. I had to go for a little walk and talk myself down but those moments come over you and you realise in there what means the most to you. And it's those family moments," Gemma shares. After the programme wrapped, Gemma immediately called Tristan and jetted back to be with him the following day. "I rang him the minute I got out of there and he was delighted," Gemma reveals.
As a prominent social media influencer, Gemma discovered that being disconnected from her device proved surprisingly freeing. Without the ability to monitor her accounts, she cultivated more meaningful bonds while in camp. "It was the best digital detox," Gemma reflects. "It was very spiritual and healing being with nature."
Following her return from South Africa, Gemma has implemented firmer boundaries around her mobile usage. "I have a rule that my mobile phone stays in my kitchen overnight now," she explains. "I think one of the worst things you can do is wake up and look straight at your phone and start scrolling. So I make sure I get up, I open my doors, I let my dogs out, I take in the morning. Then once I've had a shower and I'm ready for the day, that's when I'll action the phone.
"That has helped me a lot. One of the best things that came out in the jungle was actually having a genuine conversation. I heard stories from other campmates that I never knew about them. They found out stuff about me. We laughed. We cried. We genuinely became human again and not distracted by phones." During her time away, Gemma also became more attuned to her body and discovered she's experiencing perimenopause and requires HRT. "I was waking up just bursting into tears in the morning," says Gemma. "I've got nothing to be sad about, but it's a very strange thing. You just start to notice it coming on. One of my first symptoms was itching in the inner ear. That is what alerted me to it."
Despite Gemma's efforts to confront her anxieties before the programme, she still found the challenges difficult. "It's no secret I'm claustrophobic. It is genuine," she says. "I was put in a water tank with crocodiles and I had a fully blown panic attack in the tank. But then the klaxon went and I was just like, 'Let's do this.' Then the shock set in after. They never got easier."
Among the show's toughest aspects is subsisting on rice and beans alone. Having briefly used Mounjaro injections last year, until a gallbladder episode forced her to stop, Gemma had grown accustomed to smaller portions and was taken aback to discover she'd shed over a stone upon leaving. "When they weighed me I'd lost 1st 4lb," says Gemma.
Something Gemma found particularly hard to eliminate was the camp's odour. "You've never smelt anything like it," she says. "I stunk. It was the fish guts, even the dried mealworms have a smell. I had about five showers and one bath to get rid of the smell." Following the broadcast of I'm A Celebrity: South Africa and Gemma's anticipated public comeback, she plans to focus her energy on Four Weddings And A Baby. Tying the knot represents a monumental milestone for Gemma, who has harboured dreams of her big day since childhood. "I can't believe I left it this long to sort it out," she remarks. "But I'm glad I didn't get married when I was younger."
Regarding motherhood, Gemma insists that perimenopause won't stand in her way. "It will happen, it's just a timing thing," she reveals. "Watch the show!"
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Gemma Collins returned to I'm A Celebrity South Africa to redeem herself after quitting in 2014 – Yahoo Life UK
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